Sitting on a camel observing the world...

I took this weekend to observe some of the behaviors of people and some of the ironies of life. I was able to draw some conclusions about some things and figure a few things out about my life. I also made some serious (and humorous) conclusions about life. Here’s some of the things I’ve learned...

1) A lot of people that claim to be real are followers - I’m not hating you for it. Sometimes you just want to fit in so bad that you lose who you really are. Sometimes it’s just the journey that you take in life. But one day you will have to look in the mirror and face yourself for who you really are.

2) Marriages are really for the birds these days - Don’t get me wrong, I see a lot of folks in relationships and I’m happy that you are happy, but are you REALLY happy? I have more friends who took the jump with someone believing that it was ‘the right thing to do’ and in the end have gone through or have to go through painful and trying divorces. Please examine your life before you make that step.

3) A lot of women want to be in relationships just for the sake of companionship - I see more women that talk about their relationships. The thing that bothers me about it is they will say ‘my man/bf/whatever’ a thousand times in a convo. We get it, you are in a relationship. But what’s his name? Does he actually have an identity in your relationship other than ‘Your Man’?

4) Things on television are smaller than they appear sometimes - Sitting courtside at the Cavs game gave me a shocking realization... A lot of NBA players aren’t really that tall. However, LeBron has to be taller than 6'8"... That cat is HUGE...

5) There are a lot of guys who are only in relationships for the steady POON - Yeah I said it! I think if they had a chick that would give it up without having to have a title attached, you probably wouldn’t see many guys in relationships at all.

6) Guys really do say some stupid shit - Sorry again fellas, but you know that you speak without thinking sometimes. "I trust you but I don’t trust other guys..."

7) Grandparents at some point got switched with some strange, nice life form - Ok so at some point, my parents got swapped with these watered down extra nice people that don’t whoop kids anymore. I wish I could have gotten away with jumping on the couch when I was a kid. Sheesh...

8) Sometimes friends don’t really understand, and you have to forgive them for that - Self explanatory

9) Outside influences can destroy a good thing if the inside doesn’t know how to handle it - Sometimes people allow the words and actions of the outside world to affect how they look at their internal world. At some point, we have to learn what things don’t really apply to our internal lives and leave that in the external world.

10) Sitting on my camel in the desert, I never found my oasis... Just a bunch of mirages - Things aren’t always what they appear. Sometimes the thing that looks like a fresh spring meadow in the distance only ends up being a sand dune when you get close to it. Don’t allow your mind to be clouded with other thoughts and see the world for what it really is.

These are just a few of my observations for the weekend. I’ll post more periodically as I continue to sit on my camel... ::peace::

What Things I'm Tired of Hearing Women Say

Ok so lately, I’ve been expanding my horizons in the e-world (i.e. started a blog page, joined Twitter, etc.) and in some cases it has been an enjoyable experience. I’ve met a lot of interesting people and have gotten introduced to some new music and great views on the world.. I love hearing people’s opinions about life, relationships, music, sex and the like. However, I have noticed a lot of bitter men and women on some of these sites, but mostly women. I’ve read a few notes that women have posted and some of them are downright appalling, while others are so true. A couple of my favorite women in the world put together a list of things they are tired of hearing ‘men’(for the lack of a better term) say. Here is my rebuttal in the form of things I’m tired of hearing women say. Ready... Go...

"Niggas ain’t shit" - True statement and it’s cute to say when you are in high school and the first couple years of college, but once you’re pushing 30 and you are still talking that same yin yang, it’s time to get your life in order. You only get back what you put out.

"I’m a model" - No boo boo, you are not a model. You are a chick taking pictures in the mirror of your bathroom. I don’t see a comp card. Where’s your portfolio? Are you on modelmayhem? If not, miss me with all that.

"I’m independent" - BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... Excuse me for laughing in your face but last time I checked, the only way you are really independent is if you own your own (business, house, car, etc.). Maybe you are talking about your political affiliation? Whole ‘nother story.

"Women are smarter than men cuz we are more slick with ours" - Hmmm... you would think your smart ass would have a man that you didn’t need to creep on. If you were so damn smart, then how about devising a plan to make your man be better in bed, like , oh I don’t know, TELLING HIM WHAT YOU LIKE. And they say men are the dumb ones...

"Women are smarter than men... PERIOD" - did I miss this memo because last time I checked, you were still depending on that man to provide something for you. Something that since you are so smart you could probably do for yourself. Lazy mf’ers...

"I got a man but he ain’t acting right" - So if he’s not acting right, why is he still your man? Stop trying to have your cake and eat it too...

"I want a boyfriend" - Well when you’re through playing on the playground, go find yourself a man. Grown ass kid...

"You look like you can eat a good pussy" - Yup, I sure can. But not yours... Miss me with that.

"I’m a Diva" - Hmmm... Are you one now because Beyonce claims she’s one? Did you know that just last year, Beyonce claimed that she wasn’t a diva? You might want to catch yourself while you’re following these walking contradictions around.

And that’s not it ladies. You have some other things you need to get right in your world.

Stop lying to this guys about their dicks - Every man out here does not have the big dick or can even hit the spot properly. Stop building these cats’ egos up because it’s not helping yours or anyone else’s cause.

Stop saying I don’t need a man one second then complaining about how you don’t have a boyfriend the next - Are you bipolar? You’re not making any sense.

Stop listening to your single girlfriend about your relationship - She’s single for a reason. You’re in a relationship for a reason.

Stop trying to hook us up with your ugly friend - If she’s cute to you however when you go out, she never gets any attention, this means you probably have your friendship goggles on.

I’m done for now but there will be a part two to this.

Check This Out... Music Edition...

Every now and then, I'm going to spotlight an album or a mixtape that I like and would like for you to take a listen to. This mixtape that I'm spotlighting today is from DJ K-Nyce of the Varsity Squad. My first venture into the realm of K-Nyce was at a local party at the B-Side (if you're from Cleveland and you don't know about it, GET FAMILIAR). This was the first club event that I had gone to in awhile because I got tired of hearing the same old club music over and over. I mean seriously, I am so tired of hearing Soulja Boy it is ridiculous. To my surprise, K-Nyce played a very eclectic set, integrating music from the 70's, 80's, 90's and some of today's best. Since then, I must admit, whenever I hear he's dj-ing a set, I'm trying my hardest to be in the building. So of course when I heard he was releasing a mixtape, I was excited as hell to hear it, and trust me, it didn't disappoint. Varsity Squad Radio Vol. 1 is a great blend of today's big names in hip-hop with some of the up and coming artists that will make noise in the next couple years. The mixtape features songs from well known artists like Lil' Wayne, Q-Tip, Busta Rhymes, Jamie Foxx, Rick Ross and a list of others, as well as newcomers like KiD CuDi, Wale, Nawledge & Drake. Check the link below to download Varsity Squad Radio Vol. 1. I'm sure you won't be disappointed.

http://www.mediafire.com/?vyctmqwywed

I'm Working Two Jobs. What Are You Doing?

So I was having a chat with my coworker over lunch yesterday when she brought up a client that we picked up last year. She mentioned to me how this young lady has been working two jobs for the last few years to maintain her household. I see no problem with this, however, in the last two years, her husband managed to make just over $500! Yes, you read right, FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS!!! So I had to ask what exactly is he doing around the house all day if he is not able to go out and get a job. She didn’t have an answer for me. So this got me to thinking, how many people have really learned to maintain a household if in fact they lose their jobs, especially men.

Many of the young men I know, while knowing how to do prescribed man duties around the house (i.e. cutting the grass, painting and other miscellaneous minor repairs and maintenance), have no idea how to handle other household duties. You’d be surprised how many guys have no clue how to wash their own clothes. It’s rather depressing. I know that if it were me working two jobs and I had a mate living at home, I would have certain expectations of things that should be taken care of, especially if she wasn’t out looking for a job every moment that she could. There’s no way, if I was the one home, that I could even imagine myself not having the house cleaned and dinner ready for my wife, because I understand what it takes to be the provider for the family and to expect someone to hold down two jobs and still come home and fix dinner and wash my clothes while I sit home and do nothing, in itself, is absurd.

So chime in and tell me what you think about this situation. What would you be willing to do if you were the one without the job? What would your expectations be of your mate if your were the one providing for your household?

Master Teacher... (Inspired by Erykah Badu)

Why is it that we as black men believe standing on the corner hustlin’ is cooler than going to the library to read and get educated. Why do we feel that having sex with many women makes us more of a man than having that one woman, building her up and nurturing her? Why don’t we raise our young boys to be men rather than leaving a woman to be mommy and daddy? Why do we recognize each other as niggas rather than strong , black brothers?

When do we as a people recognize the pitfalls that we continuously set for ourselves? I pray for all my black brothers, but especially our young generations, because, like it or not, we are lost. So many of us now have no idea how to be men. Everyone wants to be grown but many of these so called men aren’t men at all. They are scared little boys whom react to situations and adversity as they believe a man should. Most of us have no idea how to truly survive a struggle and bring ourselves out of it, so we continue the same cycle over and over. We make excuses for our shortcomings instead of admitting what our faults are and finding a way to fix them. Why do we follow trends instead of the words of our elders? Life is not about being the coolest nigga on the block, because the world is larger than your block. Life is what you make of it. Be a leader, an example for your children. Work harder, be a REAL MAN, not a boy pretending to be a man. Be a husband, not a babydaddy or a player, it gets old. Build our black women up instead of breaking them down. Be informed of the world around you, not just the gossip on the block. Read, write and express your true feeling of the world. These are the principles that afford you all the opportunities that you have been afforded in the world thus far.

Understand this, I don’t knock your hustle, I just understand that we as blacks make up a small percentage of America, but almost half of the prison population is black. 65 percent of black women with children are single mothers and the percentage of them that are under 21 is much higher. We have to educated each other and teach our children. We as black men need to be better. Go to school. Don’t just make life about basketball and screwing. We have to be better. Nurture our child, help guide them to be the next great leaders of our nation. Ask for help and don’t let your pride get in the way. Learn from your elders, they’ve seen so many things that you have yet to encounter.